Billy Masters 12.26.24

"Jesus Forgives. Santa holds a grudge."

- Sara Haines' quip on "The View" when Sunny Hostin argued it was wrong to use Santa to blackmail children to behave.

With the year swiftly coming to an end, we come to our last column before Christmas. Next week, we review the best of 2024. So I thought this week we'd update some recent stories. Let's start with one of my favorite people, Belinda Carlisle. In 2014, she co—founded Animal People Alliance (APA), taking care of displaced animals in Asia. Since 2021, she's hosted a holiday party at The Abbey in West Hollywood as a major fundraiser. Every year, I swear I'll go — and every year, I'm already back east with the family. This year was no different, so I missed out on the fabulous festivities that brought in about $186K. It was hosted by Sandra Bernhard and performers included Taylor Dayne and Michelle Visage (in addition to Carlisle herself). Congrats!

By the by, Belinda's son, James Duke Mason, recently went to the swanky soirée of stylist René Horsch. Dukey posted one photo that caught my eye — with Dame Joan Collins. What's interesting about that is before marrying Belinda, Duke's dad Morgan Mason dated Dame Joan! One doesn't think of Carlisle and Collins in the same category, so I'm not sure Morgan has what I'd call a "type"...aside from gay icons!

I definitely didn't miss the reunion of "Hairspray" ladies Marissa Jaret Winokur, Laura Bell Bundy and Kerry Butler. No, I didn't see "Mama, I'm a Big Girl Now" off—Broadway, but I saw it pre—NYC at The Wallis in Beverly Hills. I'm told that the New World Stages run was a smash with most shows sold out. Being in the Big Apple, many "Hairspray" friends and family dropped in — like creators Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman, Andrew Rannells, Ross Mathews, Jonathan Groff, and even original Link, Matthew Morrison — who joined the gals for "I Can Hear the Bells". It's a great moment, which you can see on BillyMasters.com.

I may not have seen the revival of "Sunset Blvd" on Broadway (yet), but heaven knows I've written about it enough. However, Patti LuPone did see it and just weighed in. I guess she was curious. After all, she did originate the role of Norma Desmond onstage. And certainly she's conflicted about the show (aside from that whole Glenn Close thing). What did she think? "I went in with trepidation because I have strong feelings about 'the show' — not what happened to me in the show, but 'the show' — period. I loved this production! I thought Nicole [Scherzinger] and Tom [Francis] were stunning. I thought Nicole was unbelievable — she broke my heart. She is a force! I thought the cast was fantastic. The lighting, the use of the filming was something that I questioned because I don't know where I am — am I in a movie or I'm at the theatre? This worked brilliantly. The whole thing. The WHOLE thing. I was energized when I left the theatre. I love it!" Put that on the side of a bus!


"Wicked" is everywhere for the holiday, and that isn't making everybody happy. "One Million Moms" is campaigning against the film for subliminal gay content. It all started when Ariana Grande said, "Glinda might be a little in the closet. You never know. Give it a little more time." Original Broadway Glinda Kristin Chenoweth said, "I thought so too way back when..." This queer chatter got the "Moms" panties in a collective knot. Krissy wasn't having it, and issued the following statement: "Everyone knows that the 'one million Moms' are a mere few hundred. Maybe. It's called entertainment. Artistry. I am a Christian woman [who] originated the role of Glinda and all the silliness that these women spew out of hate. No no no. I can't help it: I try to love 'em anyways. For they don't get it. For anyone who wants to see girl power, then go [see] WICKED. Onstage or in a movie theater."

I previously told you that Bob Mackie was auctioning off a number of his creations. Well, Miley Cyrus made sure that her favorite frock didn't end up on the auction block. She wore a Mackie original at the most recent Grammys, and she wanted that dress...bad! She contacted Bob and made a deal, with the profits going to MusiCares. "As the designer of this dress, I couldn't imagine it on anyone else. That girl was born to perform!" said Mackie.

The day after the Mackie sale, property belonging to Olivia Newton-John hit Julien's Auctions. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, but Livvy's leather jacket from "Grease" went for just under half a million dollars!

A new version of the TV series "Prison Break" has gotten the green light from Hulu. While this is not technically a reboot, you may see a few familiar faces since it takes place "within the same universe". Both Wentworth Miller and Dominic Purcell (the hot brothers at the center of the original series) have said they will not participate.

Nobody is safe from the homeless crisis, and that includes the venerable "Sesame Street". No, they're not introducing a displaced family. But the show itself will soon be homeless! Since 2016, HBO has been producing new episodes of the beloved classic. Their 10—year agreement is up soon, and HBO has opted to not renew. While that leaves new episodes up in the air, Max will continue to be the repository of the library until 2027.

Speaking of shows geared to kids of all ages, Disney pulled the old switcheroo for Pixar's "Win or Lose". The streaming series debuts on Disney+ in February, but it'll be a bit different than planned. It's still about a co—ed middle school. The later episodes were supposed to include a very minor transgender storyline. How minor? So minor it's now been cut. Disney said, "When it comes to animated content for a younger audience, we recognize that many parents would prefer to discuss certain subjects with their children on their own terms and timeline."

Last year, one of the most popular gifts we suggested was Tom Daley's knitting kit. Yes, you too could learn how to make a "cock cozy" with your very own hands — although, frankly, I preferred real hands keeping my cock cozy. As with so many other hot men who have charged for their services, Tom is now giving his away. And he's giving them away on the public airways! "You know me. I love a bit of competition. But lately, it's been less about the pool, and more about the...wool. So I'm super excited to announce that I'm going to be hosting a brand new knitting competition show." Did I miss an "old knitting competition show"? Well, Tom's venture will be called (wait for it) — "Game of Wool". Doesn't that make you all a-quiver? Or, at the very least, itchy? A competitive knitting show? What could be more scintillating? C-SPAN springs to mind. The eight-episode run will focus on amateurs creating numerous objets d'art. It will air on UK's Channel 4, but I'm sure you'll be able to find it on YouTube eventually.

And now, the final installment of "Billy's Holiday Gift Giving Suggestions". We saved this one for last because you can't get it yet. Sexy Matteo Lane is not only a talented comedian, he's also a good cook with a rockin' ass (FYI, my computer autocorrected this to "he's also a good cock"). He has a new book coming out on April 1st. "Your Pasta Sucks: A 'Cookbook'", has a cover featuring Matteo bending over a pot of pasta in an apron, some undies, and a smile. Well, he's smiling because it's his pasta. You'll smile because...well, 'cause he's bending over! In fact, the bottom of the photo has this phrase: "Flip Me Over". Gladly. People tell me the book is terrific — with hysterical anecdotes and some actual recipes. You can pre—order it on Amazon.


In our final "Ask Billy" question of 2024, Roger in Chicago asks, "What can you tell me about Jermelle Simon? His character on "The Upshaws" is gay. What about him? He's so funny...and hawt!"

Jermelle may have had a hand in his character coming out — something that happened in 2023. He was not out at the time, but he changed that on October 11, 2024 — National Coming Out Day. "I have decided that I am enough, and I want to thank everyone who has helped me to get to that place where I feel seen, where I feel like I belong, where I feel loved. Thank you for providing a space where I can come on the internet and say, 'I am a Black gay man.'" Actually, he's a hot Black gay man — and we'll prove it with some sizzling snaps on BillyMasters.com.

When we're cooking up more hot gay men, it's definitely time to end yet another column. And that got me thinking — people come out each and every day. Yet, the ones people always ask me about are the hot ones. Why doesn't anyone write in a question about some fatty who likes men? While I ponder pounding that, let's slip in one last—minute gift suggestion. I bet anyone reading this would probably enjoy a membership to www.BillyMasters.com — the site that makes a perfect stocking stuffer. In fact, I'm willing to personally do that for you — regardless of girth. Just send a note with an address along to [email protected] and I promise to cum down your chimney before the New Year! Until next time, remember, one man's filth is another man's bible.