Billy Masters 08.25.22
"It has nothing to do with not wanting to see Lea. I text with Lea. She and I are fine. I'm thrilled for her. I love working with Julie. I loved working with Beanie. There's no drama here. None."
—Jane Lynch's exit interview upon leaving "Funny Girl". She's just FILLED with love for all the Fannys...now that she's left!
While Anne Heche was on life support, Rosie O'Donnell took to social media to say she was "feeling bad that I made fun of her when she was talking to Barbara Walters about having a relationship with space aliens." After her death, Rosie decided to sit down and read Heche's memoir, "Call Me Crazy". It didn't take long before she found a troublesome passage —which I will quote here: "I was promoting, I think, 'Donnie Brasco', and I went on the 'Rosie O'Donnell Show'. So when I was in my dressing room, I got a knock on the door and Rosie comes in and sets herself down uncomfortably in front of me and basically states, 'Let me cut to the point. If you bring up the fact that you and Ellen are a couple, I will not promote you. We will erase this episode...If you bring her up, if you bring up gay love, if you bring up love, if you bring up anything to do with the movement that you feel that you're a part of, you will not have your film promoted." Heche hastens to add that O'Donnell was not out at that time.
Rosie responds to this portion of Anne's book. "I would say not true and not likely. I can't imagine ever saying anything like that to anyone, never mind a guest about to appear on my show. So no, that was not accurate, and kind of shocking to hear it, truthfully...No way in God's green hell. So I'm sorry that we never got to talk about that. But I never said that to anyone in my life." Rosie kinda affirmed her stance by posting a second appearance by Heche on her talk show where they both spoke openly about Ellen. So there!
Before "American Idol", there was "Pop Idol" in the UK. The first winner of that show was Will Young, who has since come out (and just released a new collection of music a few months ago). The second runner-up was Darius Danesh (sometimes billed as Darius Campbell), who I met years later when he did "Chicago" in the West End, and got to know better when he appeared on the UK reality competition "Popstar to Operastar" —which he won. For some time, he was married to Natasha Henstridge, and appeared in the West End production of "Funny Girl" —on which the much-maligned Broadway production is based. Last week, Darius passed away suddenly at the age of 41. He was a lovely lad. Charming, charismatic, talented, and had a mischievous twinkle in his eye. Rest in peace.
I skipped the first runner-up on "Pop Idol", Gareth Gates. He was a cute, unassuming young man who had some success. He kinda fell off the radar, until a few years ago when he emerged with a body closer to a Marvel superhero than the tyke who warbled "Unchained Melody". When asked about his chiseled exterior, he quipped that women preferred him when he was a "skinny beanpole" —which goes to show what women know about male beauty. "But I think I look better now —it's taken me six years to get this body." Six years? I'll be collecting my pension by then! At least I have several sexy stills of Gareth to share on BillyMasters.com.
Last week Tom Daley and hubby Dustin Lance Black went to a drag show at Ku Bar in London's Chinatown. After the show, they went to another gay bar, Freedom. There they met Teddy Edwardes, founder of LICK Events. She claims that she invited them to join her group and even bought them drinks. Then a random guy sat down and made them feel uncomfortable. So Teddy asked security to move the guy away. While this was going on, Lance started grumbling and got up to leave. And that's when he threw a drink at Teddy, which she said was "pretty much unprovoked". The term "pretty much unprovoked" got my hackles up (whatever the fuck "hackles" are).
Teddy continues, "I didn't have a drink to throw back so I did choose violence, but I wasn't that violent. He got a little tap on the back of the head." I need some clarification on how we are defining a "little tap"? There's my "little tap", and then there's a lesbian "little tap" —which might render me unconscious! Teddy adds, "Tom Daley was lovely throughout. He was just trying to diffuse the situation, but unfortunately, his American, Oscar-winning filmmaker husband had other plans...what a fucking mess." The other plans were as follows. "Tell me why he is crying outside saying it's a targeted attack and that he's traumatized and called the police, and I had to wait there for hours whilst the police were asking questions...And now I have been cautioned and I have to go in for interviews. I'm sorry, but what level of rich, privileged shit makes someone think they can throw a drink over someone and nothing will happen? Because if I throw a drink over someone, I expect shit to go down!"
Hours before filing this column, I went to the world premiere of a musical based on the film "Mr. Holland's Opus". This new musical of the same name was written and directed by our own BD Wong with music by Wayne Barker, and it's been a passion project for over five years. Since it's a world premiere, one needs to view it as a work in progress. So, not surprisingly, it has a long way to go. The episodic nature of the story does not lend itself effortlessly to cohesion —which is particularly problematic in the first act. One never gets a handle on anything or anyone, so the audience is never truly invested. How to fuse these elements together is something Wong has yet to crack. An additional wrinkle is the score, which is overly ambitious and not particularly tuneful. Ensemble pieces work well, but little else lands. The second act is far more successful. Not only does it have a more straightforward narrative, it has the advantage of Joshua Castille turning in a touching performance as Holland's deaf son.
Head and shoulders above everyone in the cast is Anastasia Barzee. What she makes out of Holland's wife is miraculous. And vocally she turns in a performance reminiscent of Alice Ripley's in "Next to Normal". But the whole show hinges on Mr. Holland, and in that regard, Akron Watson is out of his depth. As an actor, he may be plausible. But as a singer, he is woefully lacking —which is surprising given his credits. Perhaps he was having a bad night. Certainly the idea of an African-American Holland adds an interesting layer to the story (although the woke references in the '70s vignette do not ring true). The production and direction are serviceable —except for the entire Cleopatra scene, which must be funnier and more over-the-top (Wong is many things, but he is not what I'd call a laugh riot). What can I say —it's a mixed bag. It's not hopeless, but based on what I saw, I'm not hopeful. But check it out for yourself —the run ends on September 10th. For more details, go to OgunquitPlayhouse.org.
Earlier this year, "Take Me Out" was a big hit on Broadway. It won Tony Awards for Best Revival of a Play and Best Featured Actor for Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It was such a hit, it's coming back. Starting on October 27th, Ferguson will join the revival's mesmerizing star Jesse Williams for a strictly limited 14-week run. We don't know which former cast members will return, but we do know that phones will again be locked to prevent nude footage from leaking out. Of course, you can already see the entire Broadway cast nude on BillyMasters.com.
Our "Ask Billy" question came out of left field (you see how I did that?). Norm in Chicago writes, "Someone told me there are new photos of Aaron Schock circulating. Have you seen them?"
If they're the photos I'm thinking of, they're no big deal. But the reaction is interesting. Every bar has a presence on social media where they will post photos of their more attractive clientele. The Eagle in NYC is no different —except usually their clientele is in some form of undress...or leather...or, occasionally, both. Eagle eyes spotted the disgraced congressman flashing his flesh next to someone sucking on something (don't get your hopes up). One person commented, "It's pathetic how low the gay community will go for a guy with abs." Trust me, I can go lower. In fact, head on over to BillyMasters.com and you, too, could be Schock's proctologist!
When we can't go any lower, it's definitely time to end yet another column. And there's even more to see on www.BillyMasters.com —the site that gets to the bottom every time. If you have a question, dash it off to [email protected], and I promise to get back to you before Rosie's next book review! Until next time, remember, one man's filth is another man's bible.